A Daily Dose of Mischief

I took #4 and #5 to the park a couple of days ago, and let them play. It was getting to be past lunch time and so I said it was time to go. #5 didn't want to go. #4 told him "If we stay here we'll die." Because we would starve to death. So we went home to eat lunch.

Our boys are notorious for having hard to control hair. #3 in particular has hair that almost always sticks up and the longer his hair the worse it is. This morning as we got ready for church I was combing his hair with a wet comb just trying to get it to lay somewhat flat. Finally I grabbed a bottle of hair gel, squirted some in my hand and applied it liberally to his wet hair. Then I combed it down , got it flat, and to my surprise it stayed that way! He came out of the bathroom a few minutes later and I asked him how he liked his hair. He said. "I like it okay. I look really good." Then he paused and looked at me sideways. "A little TOO good." After church he kept trying to mess his hair up and got frustrated that he couldn't make it stick up. After the gel dried I had combed through his hair and it looked like normal hair (i.e. not all slick and sticky looking) but try as he might, he just couldn't get it to stick up. That gel really works!

When we lived in Salem our kids' doctor was a member of Childhood Health Associates of Salem. We went there for all their check-ups and to get shots and etc. They signed the immunization records and such as CHAOS. I found that to be very appropriate.

At breakfast this morning... #5 aka C: If we eat all the bacon, we'll turn into a pig. Mommy: No you won't. (then after a pause and some thought) I guess you are right. If you ate all the bacon you would be a pig. #5 sings a song to his bacon about turning into a pig.

How hard can it be? We are trying to get #5 to offer the prayer at meals more often. He is perfectly capable of praying, I have even heard him do it, but but being the youngest he has a fascination with having us tell him what to say. The other day I asked him to say the prayer at breakfast. Since it was just him, me and #4 there I thought he wouldn't feel too nervous about it. What I didn't bargain for was the allure of food for a hungry three year old. After the usual bantering back and forth about whether or not he needed my help I gave in and started telling him what to say. It was a typically simple prayer for a kid just starting out...Heavenly Father, Thank thee for this day, Thank thee for this food, please bless the food...etc Only what came out was Heabenly Fahder , Fank vee for dis day, Fank vee for dis food, splurbity splutter, spit... Apparently once he had thanked for the food, it was too good to resist so he took a bite. The next line came out unintel...

For instance...#3 aka T calls an empty parking space a naked parking space... and just tonight at dinner #5 aka C said "His spaghetti is naked!" because #1 aka J had his without sauce.

When #5 aka C was about a year old he had a very limited vocabulary. We had some flashcards with pictures on them and when we would show him a picture of an icecream cone he would always start to make really loud slurping noises. For quite a while that was how he said ice cream.

Asgusting (pronunciation=uh skuhs ting) Translation...disgusting. I know most three year old's don't use that word, but mine does. I hear him say it almost daily. That's asgusting!

When #2 aka S was about 5 years old he told me he thought we should move to a farm. He thought it would be cool because in his own words... "Cows pee milk!"

I sometimes waste a lot of time playing puzzle games on the computer. One of the games I have been trying in vain to beat is called Hexic . It involves moving tiles in groups of three to make some of the tiles disappear, and to surround one color of tile with 6 tiles of another color to create special tiles. At higher levels of the game there are periodic bombs that will come on, and you only have a certain number of moves to remove the bomb by matching it to two other tiles that have the same color as the bomb in order to make it disappear. The boys enjoy watching for bombs when I am playing, and they like to predict when one will appear. The other day #4 and #5 were watching me and waiting for a bomb to come on the screen. #4 was trying to predict and #5 copied him, but mispronounced bomb as bum, after which he started to giggle and said, "I said bum." He thought it was the funniest thing. I have also noticed through the last ten years of parenthood that my boys find any ki...

#4 aka K age 5: Dad, what happens when you throw up on someone? Dad: They gross out. #4: What does gross out mean? Dad: It means it might make them throw up too. #5 aka C who is only 3 years old: When you throw up on someone, it splatters off them, and they think you threw a tomato at them. #4: You mean a potato. Potatoes are brown, and so is throw up... If you really want to feel like you were there for this fascinating conversation, you should picture #4 pronouncing the th in throw as an f and the r as a w...I would personally hate to fwo up on someone...that would be gwoss.

During a family discussion about our flag and how we show respect to it we were talking about the colors red, white and blue and what the flag represents. #2 aka S said: "Didn't the colors used to be black and white? I saw that in a movie once." (He was talking about a documentary we have on World War II. It was filmed in black and white... kids these days.

For a long in depth behind this little story go here . While discussing earthquakes with #4 I said, "I have been in an earthquake before." #4's eyes got very big and he asked, "Did you die?"

#4 aka K has a friend at church that he really likes. He has already made plans to marry her once they are both grown ups. He talks about her all the time much to the embarrassment of his brothers. At church the children's classes change each year in January, getting new teachers and starting a new round of lessons. #4's age group has so many kids that the class is split, and this year he was seperated from his friend. Thinking he would be upset about it I asked him how he liked his new class and if he missed his friend. He thought about it for a minute, and then said no, since there was only one other kid in his class sunday that meant that he got to eat the whole snack himself. Ah, the power of food.

I know that everyone already knows this. And yes, I know this blog is to post about my kids, and I don't actually have any girls. But today I watched the two little girls of a friend, and those little girls were not AT ALL like my boys. Now with the younger of the two I couldn't really tell, because she is too young to be very talkative and as far as I could tell she seemed pretty much laid back and easy going, although I have seen her be otherwise at times. The older of the two though, was most definately a GIRL. She talked almost nonstop, asking me questions about my clothes, where my PJs were, where my clothes were and could she see them all when we got to my house. She also seemed to own a vast number of shoes including sparkly sneakers, sparkly gold dress up shoes, and many many others. She was particular about how her socks were put on and cried because I cuffed the socks not knowing that she doesn't like them to be cuffed. All in all, she was a cute girl, and ...

When our kids hurt their brothers or partake in various other misbehaviours, they get put in Time Out. This involves standing in a specific corner in our house for a certain amount of time. Its very rare that they are willing to just stand there and wait. Usually they will incessantly ask how much time they have left. When I get tired of answering this question I usually have them count to a certain number based on their counting ability. For the older ones it will be 100 or 150, etc. For the youngest it would be ten or so. Last night #4 aka K was in time out. He kept asking the usual questions. Finally I told him to count to 20. He threw a fit. (He took longer throwing the fit than it would have taken to just count to 20.) Then he said with a little snarl on his face... How come we can't just count to zero!

This question came from #4 aka K last night. I was trying to enjoy a relaxing bath but the boys kept coming to the bathroom door to talk to me. I ended up trapped behind the shower curtain while K poked his head around the door to ask me what happened when the moon got full. Me: The moon gets brighter, and its lighter outside. Go ask Dad. K: I already DID! Me: What did he say? K: He said it reflects light. Me: That's right. K: Are werewolves going to come? Me: There are no such things as werewolves. K: (after a long pause) I think you're lying. Me: K, there are NO werewolves. They are made up. K: Oh. I am still not sure he believes me. Here I thought he wanted a scientific answer about why the moon gets full, and all he was worried about was when the werewolves were going to come and get us.