15 minutes ALONE

Is that too much to ask? Apparently it is.I have to go through a kind of a ritual before I take a shower. It involves things like turning the heat up so that the bathroom mirror doesn't fog up (and so I don't freeze getting in and out of the shower), checking to make sure the boys are being entertained in a non-destructive way, letting them know I am going to take a quick shower...etc.
Usually I only have two of the boys home for this time of day...the others are all at school. Today however, it being Spring Vacation this week, I had all five of the boys to worry about. I decided not to tell them I was taking a shower since they all seemed engaged in their various activities. They found me anyway.
We only have one bathroom that has to be shared between 7 people (technically 6 since #5 refuses to potty train). Its to be expected that if you are going to be in the bathroom for any length of time, you are likely to be disrupted by someone standing outside the door yelling that they have to go, BAD! (Maybe I should make them all use the facilities before I go in for my shower-what a great idea!)
Today I had high hopes of getting through the shower without disruption. I had finished the shampooing, and had the conditioner in my hair when someone knocked. It was #1, but I couldn't hear what he was saying over the sound of the water, and the heater or through the closed and locked door. I poked my head around the shower curtain and told him he would have to open the door so I could hear him.Clomp, clomp, clomp...off he went to the kitchen to find a table knife to pick the lock. (If you are ever at my house and need a table knife-just check outside the bathroom door if there are none in the drawer). Once he had picked the lock I poked my conditioner covered head around the shower curtain again. He mumbled something about a sandwich...it went something like this...
#1: Mom, can I have a sandwich...cookie?
Me: You interrupted my shower to ask for a cookie?
#1: Uh...(eyes darting around guiltily) yeah. So can I have one?
Me: ONE cookie for each of you. (I figured this would stop the endless train of boys coming to ask me if they could have one too. I was also thinking that while I was annoyed that he had disrupted my shower for that, at least he asked this time...remind me to tell you about the sugar cube incident).
So I am back to my shower...rinsing out the conditioner, washing up the rest of me, when I hear the door open again (once the lock is picked there is no hope). I poked my head around the curtain to see who it was. It was #4 doing the potty dance. I told him to go ahead and go, to wash his hands and to close the door when he left. (He had kindly left it open when he came in, so there was a lovely COLD breeze running around the bathroom).
Finally he left, slamming the door. By this time I was out of hot water...so I got out and started to dry off. I also relocked the door.Then the yelling started.
#4: MOM! T is going to poke me!
#3: No I'm NOT!
#4: HE'S TRYING TO POKE ME!
Me: T, Leave him alone!
#3: I'm not POKING him!
#4: MOM! He's trying to poke me!
Me: T! LEAVE HIM ALONE!
I wrapped myself in a towel, opened the door, saw #3 with a clicker pen in his hand and saw that he had #4 cornered. I grabbed the pen, closed the door and locked it...again. Then I got to listen to #3 explain that he was going to press the button on the pen so the pointy part wasn't sticking out, and THEN he was going to poke #4 so it didn't hurt.
The rest of my drying off and brushing my hair was punctuated with requests for food, and tattling on brothers. Maybe I will get take tomorrow's shower at midnight so that I can enjoy the hot water in peace. Of course the boys do sometimes get up at night to use the bathroom...that would be just my luck.

Comments

Michelle Alley said…
What a pain! We have one main bathroom where the shower and tub are and one toilet on the main floor - it used to be a closet. But at least it's a second toilet!

Cute Post!

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